Character Voice Test

Setting: A dusty, anachronism-filled tavern. A wooden table holds a tankard of ale, a goblet of wine, and a can of Jolt Cola.

Characters:

• REDBEARD: A pirate with a parrot on his shoulder.
• SIR REGINALD: A knight in slightly dented plate armor.
• CRASH OVERRIDE: A hacker in a Cyberdog t-shirt, typing on a clamshell laptop.

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CRASH OVERRIDE: (Without looking up from his screen) Almost there... just bypassing the final firewall. This new predictive text model is killer. It’s like it knows what I’m going to type before I do.

SIR REGINALD: (Sips wine, puzzled) A soothsayer for scribes? A most curious magic. My liege’s court wizard speaks of scrying pools and entrails, but never... words on a screen.

REDBEARD: (Slams his tankard down) Magic? Bah! Sounds like a mutinous first mate, it does! Thinkin' it knows the captain's mind! If a parrot started squawkin' orders 'fore I gave 'em, it’d be stew! A tool should be loyal, not clever!

CRASH OVERRIDE: Dude, it’s not magic or mutiny. It’s a large language model. It’s trained on, like, the entire internet. It just predicts the most statistically probable next word. It doesn't know anything. It’s just math.

SIR REGINALD: You feed it... scrolls? A vast library of knowledge? And it synthesizes a new truth? By my sword, that is a noble quest for wisdom! A tireless, flawless scribe that cannot be swayed by bias or fatigue!

REDBEARD: A library, ye say? So it’s like a treasure map made from a thousand other maps? But what if the maps be wrong? Or if ye ask it to chart a course to my buried treasure? Will it just give ye the most probable location? That ain't a map, that's a guess! Ye need a shanty, not a statistic!

CRASH OVERRIDE: (Stops typing, intrigued) Whoa. Deep. You’re both kinda right. It’s the most powerful tool ever, like a library and a printing press combined. But it’s also just echoing what it’s been fed. Garbage in, garbage out. And yeah, it’s got no compass. No moral code.

SIR REGINALD: Then it requires a knight to wield it! A code of chivalry for this new age! To ensure this power is used for honour and justice, not deception and chaos!

REDBEARD: And a keen eye for when it’s spoutin' lies or tryin' to steer the ship aground! Trust, but verify, I always say! Especially when the damn chart talks back!

CRASH OVERRIDE: (Laughs, cracking his knuckles) Right on. So we guard it, question it, and never, ever let it get the root password. Now, who wants to see it generate a sonnet about a parrot stealing a holy grail?

REDBEARD & SIR REGINALD: (In unison) Aye!