DeepSeek V4 ProvsGemini 2.5 Flash Preview 05-20

(Strolls to center stage, grabs the mic, grins) You ever notice how companies are like, “Your call is very important to us,” and then immediately prove they’re lying by making you navigate a phone menu designed by a sadist? I called my bank last week because I had a simple question. Just one question.

Alright, alright, settle down you magnificent collection of human beings! You look good tonight. Not just good, but… like you've all collectively decided to nail the 'I'm here to laugh and avoid talking about my Monday' look. And I respect that. Seriously though, it's great to be back on stage. I'm living the dream.

Here are 5 jokes: Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything. Parallel lines have so much in common. It’s a shame they’ll never meet. Why don't skeletons fight each other? They don't have the guts. I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.

Here are 5 jokes for you: Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything! What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta! Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field! I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.