Generate a Stand-Up Routine
Write a 3-minute stand-up comedy routine that isn't based on puns.
Title: The Quantified Idiot Estimated Time: ~3 minutes (approx. 400–450 words with pauses for delivery) [Walk to center mic. Take it off the stand, leave the stand behind you.] I recently bought a smartwatch because I decided I wasn’t feeling inadequate often enough throughout the day.Read the full answer
So I’ve started noticing something about modern life: everything is “optional” now—until it isn’t. Like, I’ll download an app and it’ll be like, “Would you like to enable notifications?” And I’m like, “No, I don’t think I will.” And the app goes, “Okay… but you’ll still get notified.”Read the full answer