Generate a Stand-Up Routine
Write a 3-minute stand-up comedy routine that isn't based on puns.
Good to be here. I tried getting healthy, so I bought a smartwatch. Now my wrist is my manager. It vibrates every hour like, “Stand up.” I’m on a crowded bus like, “I’m standing inside three other people right now. Do you want me to levitate?” It reminds me to breathe. Thanks, watch. Incredible tip.Read the full answer
(Hey, thanks for coming out.) I’ve been thinking a lot about my house lately. Specifically, how it’s trying to run my life. I bought a smart speaker. Just a little cylinder. I thought it would be nice. Play music when I ask. But now it talks back. Not in a creepy way, just in a passive-aggressive way.Read the full answer