Generate a Stand-Up Routine
Write a 3-minute stand-up comedy routine that isn't based on puns.
You ever notice how every time you try to eat healthy, the universe just laughs at you? Like, I'll buy a bunch of kale, quinoa, and those weird little chia seeds. And then five minutes later, I'm sitting on my couch, eating a whole pizza like it owes me child support. I don't even know when that transformation happens.Read the full answer
Alright, so I decided this year I was finally going to become one of those organized people. You know, the ones who meal prep on Sundays and have matching Tupperware. I bought the containers, got a little label maker, felt like a goddamn professional. Cooked enough chicken and rice to feed a small army.Read the full answer