Generate a Stand-Up Routine
Write a 3-minute stand-up comedy routine that isn't based on puns.
Three minutes, no puns. Here we go. Do you ever feel like you’ve been dropped into a game at level 40 but nobody explained the controls? Like you’re playing Grand Theft Auto and you get a truck for your first car. I was like, “What’s the gas button? What do the lights do? Why does it keep asking for a maintenance fee?”Read the full answer
"Modern Life Problems" [Walks on stage, adjusts mic] So I downloaded one of those meditation apps last week. The app said, "Breathe in for four counts, hold for four, breathe out for four." I'm like, "Finally! Someone who speaks my language – a robot!" [Pause] But then it asked me to "clear my mind of all thoughts."Read the full answer