Generate a Stand-Up Routine
Write a 3-minute stand-up comedy routine that isn't based on puns.
Hey everyone, how's it going tonight? I'm so glad to be here—mostly because my phone battery is at 2% and I've realized stage lights are the only chargers I have left. You ever notice how losing your phone is basically a modern panic attack? You pat every pocket like you're defusing a bomb: "Is it in my jeans?Read the full answer
(The comedian walks to the center of the stage, adjusts the mic stand, and looks at the audience with a tired smile.) Has anyone else noticed that calling a customer service line is the only situation in life where you voluntarily enter a hostage negotiation? I tried to call my internet provider yesterday.Read the full answer