Generate a Stand-Up Routine
Write a 3-minute stand-up comedy routine that isn't based on puns.
Good to be here. I tried getting healthy, so I bought a smartwatch. Now my wrist is my manager. It vibrates every hour like, “Stand up.” I’m on a crowded bus like, “I’m standing inside three other people right now. Do you want me to levitate?” It reminds me to breathe. Thanks, watch. Incredible tip.Read the full answer
Ladies and gentlemen, ever notice how people treat their phones like they’re precious artifacts? We all have those moments where we swipe and scroll like our lives depend on it. You're on the bus, everyone’s glued to their screens. It's like zombies, but instead of brains, we crave likes and retweets.Read the full answer